Sunday Experience

It’s been almost five years since I’ve done a blogpost. This makes me sad, but is just indicative of how busy life has been the past five years. I’ll try to go back and post pictures from the last five years, but today I wanted to post about an experience I had and I don’t want to wait until I have filled in the five year gap.

For scripture study, I am following the Come Follow Me program and more home centered church experience. I read a chapter a day and write a brief thought in my scripture journal. I am not perfect at it, but I keep trying. On Sundays, I often get to spend a little more time studying.

Today I was reading Mosiah 21-24, when the people of Alma and King Limhi’s people were burdened by being in bondage to the Lamanites. In Mosiah 21:15 it states, “...the Lord did hear their cries & did soften the hearts of the Lamanites.” And then in v. 19 we learn, “the Lord caused a deep sleep” on the Lamanites so Alma and his people could escape. Then in 24:14-16, the Lord eased their burdens & strengthened them. And particularly in v. 16, “so great was their faith and their patience.”

After reading these chapters, I came away feeling very sad. I always read the scriptures through a lens of my life and how the things that happened to these people can help me with my life events. I felt today that I simply must not have enough faith or patience to get the blessings I seek. Some of my children are really struggling, and I pray for them constantly but don’t feel that much changes. Thus, I have determined yet again that if I had more faith....you see where this is going.

Then I decided to read in the Come Follow Me manual to finish up, and there was a reference for a talk by President Monson from the October 2013 General Conference titled “I Will Not Fail Thee, nor Forsake Thee.” I had such a powerful witness by the Spirit as I read this talk that LIFE IS SUPPOSED TO BE HARD. Duh. Even at almost 54 years old I want life to be easier, and I want to know I have God in my corner. I was reminded that He is in my corner, and that faith and patience are the order of the day because life is hard. It just is, and I need to square my shoulders and trust that it is all for my good, and for my children’s good.

The talk begins by President Monson talking about the death of his wife a few months before, and his tremendous loss and pain of missing her. That humbled me right there, and then I read on...here are some of the passages that were particularly meaningful:

When the pathway of life takes a cruel turn, there is the temptation to ask the question “Why me?” At times there appears to be no light at the end of the tunnel, no sunrise to end the night’s darkness. We feel encompassed by the disappointment of shattered dreams and the despair of vanished hopes. We join in uttering the biblical plea, “Is there no balm in Gilead?” We feel abandoned, heartbroken, alone. We are inclined to view our own personal misfortunes through the distorted prism of pessimism. We become impatient for a solution to our problems, forgetting that frequently the heavenly virtue of patience is required.

The difficulties which come to us present us with the real test of our ability to endure. A fundamental question remains to be answered by each of us: Shall I falter, or shall I finish? Some do falter as they find themselves unable to rise above their challenges. To finish involves enduring to the very end of life itself.

Then he talked briefly about Job and his challenges, and then it felt like he related it to me:

Job kept the faith. Will we do likewise as we face those challenges which will be ours?

Whenever we are inclined to feel burdened down with the blows of life, let us remember that others have passed the same way, have endured, and then have overcome.

The history of the Church in this, the dispensation of the fulness of times, is replete with the experiences of those who have struggled and yet who have remained steadfast and of good cheer. The reason? They have made the gospel of Jesus Christ the center of their lives. This is what will pull us through whatever comes our way. We will still experience difficult challenges, but we will be able to face them, to meet them head-on, and to emerge victorious.

From the bed of pain, from the pillow wet with tears, we are lifted heavenward by that divine assurance and precious promise: “I will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.” Such comfort is priceless.
As I have traveled far and wide throughout the world fulfilling the responsibilities of my calling, I have come to know many things—not the least of which is that sadness and suffering are universal. I cannot begin to measure all of the heartache and sorrow I have witnessed as I have visited with those who are dealing with grief, experiencing illness, facing divorce, struggling with a wayward son or daughter, or suffering the consequences of sin. The list could go on and on, for there are countless problems which can befall us.

Our Heavenly Father, who gives us so much to delight in, also knows that we learn and grow and become stronger as we face and survive the trials through which we must pass. We know that there are times when we will experience heartbreaking sorrow, when we will grieve, and when we may be tested to our limits. However, such difficulties allow us to change for the better, to rebuild our lives in the way our Heavenly Father teaches us, and to become something different from what we were—better than we were, more understanding than we were, more empathetic than we were, with stronger testimonies than we had before.

My brothers and sisters, may we have a commitment to our Heavenly Father that does not ebb and flow with the years or the crises of our lives. We should not need to experience difficulties for us to remember Him, and we should not be driven to humility before giving Him our faith and trust.
May we ever strive to be close to our Heavenly Father. To do so, we must pray to Him and listen to Him every day. We truly need Him every hour, whether they be hours of sunshine or of rain. May His promise ever be our watchword: “I will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.”

I am grateful for the Holy Ghost who brings things to my remembrance and reminds me that God is near and is good and this life is a time for me to grow and learn. So, I will look forward and keep going. Keep trusting. Keep trying. Keep loving.